Don’t know the providence of this story, but it’s amazing!

The Haggadah Speaks of Four Kinds of People Who Use Zoom:
- The Wise
- The Wicked
- The Simple
- The One Who Does Not Know How to “Mute”

The Wise Person says: “I’ll handle the Admin Feature Controls and Chat Rooms, and forward the Cloud Recording Transcript after the call.”

The Wicked Person says: “Since I have unlimited duration, I scheduled the meeting for six hours—as it says in the Haggadah, whoever prolongs the telling of the story, harei zeh ‘shubach, is praiseworthy.”

The Simple Person says: “Hello? Am I on? I can hear you but I can’t see you.” [Jerusalem Talmud reads here: “I can see you, but I can’t hear you.”]

The One Who Does Not Know How to Mute says: “How should I know where you put the keys? I’m stuck on this stupid Zoom call with these idiots.”
  To the Wise Person you should offer all of the Zoom Pro Optional Add-On Plans.

To the Wicked Person you should say: “Had you been in charge, we would still be in Egypt.”

So excited! 📺🍿

So, I stepped outside to walk back to my apartment and my allergies immediately went nuts. Super itchy eyes. And I couldn’t wipe them or put in my eye drops until I walked back and washed my hands, squinting the entire time, hoping I wouldn’t run into anything. 🤪

Nothing like a fire alarm to jerk one out of a virtual Meeting for Worship! 🤦‍♂️🚨

The Naked Gun has us all set for intimacy in the age of social distancing.

(Content warning: Link is a slightly racy YouTube video).

Kevin Drum keeps talking about the need to means test any checks the government sends out. The current interest rate on a 1 year Treasury is a whomping 0.3%*. For every million dollars the government borrows, it has to pay back $3,000 more in a year. Is it really that much to pay to simplify things and get checks into people’s hands as fast as possible?

Investors are practically paying the US government to hold their money. We can afford to spend billions upon billions upon billions because it doesn’t actually cost anything to do so!

* The five year rate is a ginormous 0.794%.

Facebook’s current killer feature for me: a friend posting multiple videos of his corgis per day! 💛🐶💛

Given my struggles with self-isolation, it’s hard to avoid isolating too much when the entire world is telling us to isolate. 😕

With interests rates as low as they are, I the US federal government should just borrow a few hundred billion and send everyone a check. Working class people in service industries are going to be hit especially hard and that would be the fastest way to get cash in their hands.

I’m behind on this one, but just finished the sixth episode of Watchmen and woah. That show really puts one through the emotional ringer. 🤯

I’m really worried about my mother—she’s over 70, living in NYC, and has air travel planned for next week.

Just saw Emma and it was lovely. 🎥

I posted about a personal dilemma on Facebook this afternoon and got some really good advice. 🤯

I am perhaps overly proud of my achievement. 😁📸

One upside of Facebook: looking at friends’ posts has convinced me to canvas for Warren this weekend. 🤓

So what’s the over/under on MacBook keyboard photos today? 😉

For folks who were interested in the headlamps and tortoise show, there’s now a trailer from the January performance on the company’s website. 💛🐢💡 //@macgenie

Half way to the shiny, shiny photoblogging pin! 🤞🎖

Tip: If you go to the National Museum of African American History and Culture, plan to spend the entire day. I reserved a 12:30p entrance and only made it through two of the three history floors by the time the museum closed at 5:30p.

On the Acela. Zoom, zoom. 🚂

On my way to DC. 🚂

Another show, another run in with an old friend! :)

Mmmmmm, seat by fire on a chilly winter day. 🔥🌬🔥

This is completely fine. Nothing at all to worry about. 🔥🌎🔥

Because I adore being contrary, I just spent far too long to discover that Sawtooth Mustard Greens exist! 🤓 //@macgenie (I’m guessing mustard greens are either not good for or not favored by the piglets, but I still declare victory! 🤪)